The other day I was trying to smooth down my son Jake’s hair. He had this Alfalfa thing going on and it seemed like there wasn’t enough water to keep his hair from sticking up. Then he wouldn’t hold still and kept trying to swat my hand away. Finally he says to me, “Mom stop. I don’t care what my hair looks like. Mom, you just don’t know what boys care about.”
OK yeah … he got me there. Never having been a little boy or having a brother for that matter, I really don’t know or understand what boys care about. Some days I look at him and even though I see my face staring back at me, I realize there is a total disconnect between us. I am a girl and he’s a boy. It’s just as simple as that.
Alright … so what’s all this boy stuff that I apparently don’t know about? I watched him for a few days to try to figure this out.
First thing I discovered was his obsession with Pokeman and collecting things. He showed me his Pokeman trainer license. Honestly it was something he found in one of his Pokeman books, wrote his name on it and then taped it up to keep it from getting ripped. When he bragged about it to everyone at camp, the kids asked him to bring it in. They were so impressed that he was only one in summer camp who is an official Pokeman trainer.
See this? Apparently, this is important stuff to a boy:
And then there’s this show he watches called Lego Ninjago: Masters of Spinjitzu. Anyone know what I’m talking about? Maybe its just me but I swear it looks like like a bunch of legos dressed like samurai soldiers. Does anyone else see this? Or is it just me because I’m a girl?
He can watch this show like a 100 times and never get tired of it. And try to talk to him when the show is on? It’s like trying to talk to a man when he’s watching his favorite football team and asking him if he likes the red curtains or the ones with the stripes. I get a lot of ‘huh’ and ‘what?’ from him and that’s about it. Because once again, this is important stuff to boys. This is what they care about.
My biggest realization came when I was finally able to wrestle the remote control out of his hands. He went upstairs to take a shower so let’s just change that channel from cartoons to …. oh yeah, there it is … Cupcake Wars. This show ranks up in my top 5 for Food Porn TV.
Jake comes downstairs just as the contestants are lining up to hear what the judges have to say. Looking for the remote and seeing the look on my face, he realizes he’s not going to be able to change the channel and tries to watch the show with me. Finally he says, “Cupcake Wars, what is this show?” I explained to him what the show was about and he says, “You know what would it make it better? If they made all these cupcakes and then hit each other with them. And then they had cakes and pies and have a something like a home run derby. Like they have a contest to see who could hit the most people with the most cupcakes. They’d probably have more people watch the show.”
After that conversation, I decided to give up on my research. I give in, I don’t get it. I can be the best mommy in the world but I’ll probably never understand what it is boys care about.