Some days when I’m walking my dog Winston, I watch how he interacts with the other cats and dogs in the neighborhood. During a long walk, my mind will wander into all those kid movies and cartoons I’ve seen where all the animals talk to each other. I imagine all these cats and dogs are really a part of a secret animal agency (guess I’ve seen way TOO many TUFF Puppy episodes!) and Winston is one of the top secret dog agents.
As I’ve said before, Winston is a dog of many names and being a secret dog agent, he now has his own code name: Poopie McPooperson (or Poops for short). When Poops talks to the other animals on our walks, I imagine he has a cool a British Bond-like accent. Something like Ricky Gervais (I love the way he laughs, you can just hear him banging on the table and trying to catch his breath).
Every day when we go on a walk, Poops does a recon mission to keep all the humans safe from the evil cats who have plans to take over the neighborhood.
He often stops to do a few strategic moves, you know to keep him in practice for the big day when the evil cat army will rise up against us.
After many weeks of recon, Poops has discovered who is the leader of the cats. He’s a black and white cat known as Mr Figglehorn. This cat usually avoids all human contact but you can tell he’s the one in charge by the way he struts around the neighborhood. The first time Poops got a good a look at Figglehorn, he was walking directly across the street from us. He kept exact pace with us and did not once look our way even though Poops was jumping and up and down and barking ‘look at me, look at me!’ in his best golden retriever voice.
Occasionally we run into Figglehorn’s henchman Hank. Notice how close he is to Poops and he makes no moves to run away. He’s holding his ground and protecting his leader of the cats.
And then one day, we found him. Poops couldn’t believe his luck and made sure he filed the report with the dog agency. We found the infamous Mr Figglehorn. I was able to catch him in this photo before he took off into the bushes. They don’t call him a world class spy for nothing. He may look sweet and innocent but he’s no ordinary cat.
In the words of Monty Python: That’s the most foul, cruel, and bad-tempered cat you ever set eyes on!
Stay tuned for the next exciting adventure of Poopie McPooperson as he discovers the answer to the burning question, ‘are small dogs really dogs or are they just double secret agents for the cats?’